June 27th

I never thought that I would say those words to someone again
and then you happened.
I never thought that I would feel alive again
and then you happened.
I never thought that I would truly find my Home
and then you happened.
I never thought that I would let someone hold me again,
without it feeling wrong, like it didn’t belong
and then you happened.
I never thought that I would smile so much that my cheeks would hurt
and all you’d have to do is look at me,
and then you happened.
I never thought that I would let myself trust in anyone or anything again
and it isn’t easy,
and then you happened.
I never thought that someone would have enough patience to deal with me,
and then you happened.
I never thought that someone would look at me and be in complete awe of me,
feeling honored to have me,
and then you happened.
I never thought that someone could love me the way that I needed, the way that I pleaded
and then you happened.
I never thought that I would truly find myself again,
that abundance of love I had back in my innocence;
a freedom one only wishes for again,
but then you would say,
‘It wasn’t I that happened, It was God that happened.’
I never thought that I would truly believe in God in blind faith,
but then,
HE.
Happened.
And it’s only The Beginning.

(c) Al’Nysa S. Goodwin

Loves’ Sour Spoils

He says that he.
Loves.
Me?
I hear the words, but I only.
Hear the words, I do not believe
Oh the memories from my past
renders me
incapable of letting someone love me
truly?
But his consistency and persistence
threatens this cocoon
I.
have.
placed my.
fragile heart in.
He.
Will.
Not.
let me be.
He constantly says he loves me.
Threatens me with kindness and patience
Calls me beautiful
not for selfishness
but of genuine hearted-ness
oh, he will not let me.
Be.
and I see.
Yes! I see that he loves me
but I am blinded by my own past memories.
I will not be a fool in hands, I will not let myself fall for this.
Smooth trickery?
but He constantly shows he
Loves Me.
Until the day I believe
Will I ever believe
Truly.
Without a single doubt.
Clouding me?
How long will he love.
Me.

(C) Al’Nysa S. Goodwin

Rush.. 🌷

I want to feel the rush of a crush.
The excitement; the unpredictability of infinite possibilities.
I want to feel those infinite butterflies,
until I’m so nervous I can’t think straight
or remember to breathe.

I want to smile from ear to ear
because of something he sends or says to me. I want to ride on the
whirlwind that is the cosmic ocean of our intellectual beings
as we unlock mysteries and new beginnings.

I want to dive deep into his red sea,
where chaotic storms are brewed; his heart, a new adventure for me as we twist
and turn falling deeper down the rabbits hole,
unleashing all his secrets without judgements.
And I’ll reciprocate, as he too will be yearning.

I just want to feel the rush of a crush. The excitement of new beginnings
with the unpredictabilities of infinite possibilities.
And if I so happen to get lost, I hope he’ll get lost with me.

                                                                                                                                             © Al’Nysa S. Goodwin

The Utmost Grace

They say that it’s big of her because she walked away.
That she handled it with the utmost grace. But what they don’t know is
that her heart cries every night and every time the pain is always heavier
She never speaks about it because the person she wants to confide in,

she had to walk away from. She fights a seemingly endless urge to call him.
To want to hear his voice. To watch at his energy swallows her.
But with the utmost grace, she loves him from a far.
She loves him in her dreams and with all her soul.
And with the utmost grace she chose wisdom, instead of pain.
© Al’Nysa S. Goodwin