ღ HOPE ღ

She wasn’t like any women you have ever seen, she was different. I know it’s a cliché, but she was. She was dealt a life with its own trials and tribulations, which was no different from any other life. When I say she was different, I don’t mean her circumstance, I mean Her. There was a grace about her. Her essence hummed and it resonated with everything she touched or even looked at, but she wanted to stay hidden; to remain unseen by all who sees. For the most part she remained unseen, but there were a few who saw her grace. If she smiled, there it was. If she looked at you, it was as clear as day. She cared for people in a way that doesn’t exist anymore. So when she looked at you, she saw you. For the few that have seen her, all wondered why she wanted to hide. After a while she forgot why she wanted to hide but still, she remained hidden.

As the years flew by her Grace grew stronger and she was luminous. It was hard for her to stay hidden and that didn’t scare her as much as it did before. She would laugh freely, be playful, with those close to her. Her grace grew so strong that she was revealing herself to her. She spoke with pure kindness. She laughed at herself, which took years for that to happen. She was always an ear to listen, a heart to understand, and when she understood, it wasn’t like anything you thought you knew. She had a gift for understanding. Anyone who ever needed her, no matter what she was going through, there she was. She was the Wise One, the advice that came from her, was individual only. By that I mean, it was strategically structured in the that it was delivered that you never thought a door would be open, or that it existed.

Her grace blossomed even more. She had another, the gift to inspire. She could inspire you to do things beyond what you could even imagine. Inspiration surrounded her, and those who saw her, all they could do was stare in awe and respect her. Her intentions were always translucent, she had no ulterior motives. She had the gift of Sight, so when she saw you, she saw who you’ll be. She saw potential in its rarest form. She saw passion and she inspired. Her Grace, now fully bloomed, was Hope. Those who wanted to dream bigger, would remember her and the words she spoke. For them, she was Hope. But for her, they were her Hope; a vision, a promise of a better place.

In response to “Everyday Inspiration” by The Daily Post Day Three: One-Word Inspiration.

Greatest Fear

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “1984.”

Nothing but darkness surrounds me. A cool breeze covers me like a thick blanket. A dim light begins to rise as my surroundings become clearer; four walls and a barred window. No way out. There’s a faint tapping sound in a dark corner of the room. I realize then that I am not alone. “Who’s there?” I say trying hard to project toughness, but failing miserably. The tapping stops for just a moment then continues. Panic and fear all but drowns me. I feel the walls caving in around me. “No need to panic Darling’. Relax, take a seat.” a voice says, soft and playful, like this is a game, like I am the game. It’s voice sounds familiar,
“Do I know you?” I ask.
“Would you like to—” it asks, playfully intrigued. I back up to hit the cold hard wall behind me; heart nearing my throat.
“May be, maybe not,” the voice continues. “How ’bout I tell
you a little story. You like stories don’t you.”
I could feel it smiling, knowing something I don’t. My mind is racing, searching for a way out. Hopelessness takes a hold of me when we both realize there’s no way out. I slide down to the cold wooden floor and stare at the snow falling outside the window. In defeat I reply to the malevolent stranger in this prison with me, “What’s the story?”
“Ah, I knew you’d be interested, not that you really have
a choice, Darling child. Hm. Once upon a time,” it giggles. “Sorry,
that gets me every time. Once upon a time, there was
this young, beautiful girl who loved Love and all beautiful
things. She was quite shy, never really spoke much, but over
the years that changed. She grew comfortable in her skin. She fell
in love or what she thought was love, you know how us girls can be.
She got her heart broken numerous amounts of times, but
she still searched for that love she dreamed about. For that feeling that
love brought. Heartache after heartache, she still searched.
Now she was different and everyone who passed her could see it, sense it, feel it.
No matter how much she didn’t want to be noticed, people noticed her. She was the
modest-beauty type. She grew into a beautiful women, with a heart as strong and
a mind as wise, all who witnessed her heart would never be the same–but I mean for someone
so wise and crap, why would you let your heart get broken so many damn times.
Don’t get me wrong, she was no saint, broken a couple hearts herself but what the fuck.
At some point searching just..”
As the playful voice rants on, the story itself seems all too familiar. Me and this girl could be the same person. Staring out at the snow, I wonder if she ever found happiness.
“Darling,” the voice calls, “Listen, the story only gets better from here.
Now as I was saying, before you rudely wandered off in your own thoughts, this young,
beautiful girl yearned for this Love that only she dreamed—up until she met the
man that made it all come true. This man invaded her beautiful little world and made all the flowers bloom and the rainbows shine, made the fires within her heart rise and rise.
Oh this man showed her the love she dreamed was true-”
“How do you know so much about this girl.” I interrupt, panic rising through me once again as this story sounds too familiar. The faceless stranger giggles and the room gets colder. It sighs,
“You shouldn’t interrupt my story, the ending will surprise you, now where was I,
ah yes, he showed her that the love she dreamed did exist. He delivered himself to her
so eloquently, I’ll admit no one could resist such superb Charm and so she fell harder
and harder as the months flew by. She laughed louder and harder. She even sang louder;
the sweet melody that echoed in her heart. Oh, she loved this man and all that he was, ’till one day every thing changed.
Her world began to fall apart as he began to walk away. Piece by piece, her beautiful little world
began to disintegrate to nothing. The flowers that once bloomed vibrantly, withered and died
in the blink of an eye. The rainbows, with all its’ radiant colors, began to fall like teardrops
from the darkened sky. And the burning fires that surrounded her heart in a heap of passion
turned against her, as it slowly burned away her beautiful, delightful heart-”
“Stop it. Stop it!” I scream tears pouring. “Who are you?” I demanded, standing to my feet. The voice laughs once more, “If you haven’t figured it out by now Darling, you should just let me finish the stor-”
“WHO ARE YOU” I interject, voice growing louder in annoyance. This stranger, this place. No sun, no warmth, no light; nothing but darkness. There’s movement in the corner, where the stranger starts to stand.
“That beautiful, vibrant young girl and I have a lot in common.
You see Darling,”
the voice steps into the dim light, purple and blue patches on her skin; scars, open wounds, bruised and broken. I make my way up to her face and I stop breathing all at once, my heart races and my eyes grow wide as I stare at a face that I know so well.
“I am You. I am the Love that dying. I am the Hate. The Anger.
The You that knows no mercy, only Revenge. I am your greatest fear.
The part of you that you’ve imprisoned.”
It. Her. Me? The room begins to spin and all I want to do is sleep and wake up from whatever twisted self-reflection shit this is. I am drawn to the window by the turbulence outside and as I look out, what I thought was snow was really ash. Tears pour down my cheeks as clarity consumes me. I will never truly be free as this darkness swallows me. I realize then, that I will never, ever be the same.

ETERNAL LOVE

Sebastian

The way he kisses me should send me to my death. I should burst in flames and enjoy the excruciating pain that is his love. The place where my heart use to be sends the beating vibrations all through me; an echoing shadow of this long dead heart of mine. He deserves better than what I am giving him. How I am treating him. But I can’t stay away. His human heart beats as mine would if I had one. This goes against so many laws. So many rules that could result in death. For the both us.

“Lilah,” He says bringing my attention back to him, “I don’t know why you came into my life but please don’t ever leave me. I know it breaks the rules of this dark world you live in, but the day you leave me I would rather die than never see you again.” Staring shocked and in utter disbelief that I feel the same way but knowing that this will eventually come to an end, I lie because I want to believe that something will change, “Sebastian,” I say looking into his mesmerizing Blue eyes, “I’d break the laws for you over and over again. I’d die over and over again just to see those eyes of yours. To see the way you look at me. To hear your heart beat and rush as I come closer to you. I love you”

We stand looking out at the moon, he grabs my face and my cold skin tingles. And without waiting his lips are on mine. This kiss, our kiss lights my skin on fire. His hands caressing my body, I slam him down, “AH!” he yells. I keep forgetting that he’s fragile, that he’s human and the fear that I could kill him, that I’ve could’ve killed him, swims inside me. My eyes are full of worry. He grabs my face and brings it to his mouth and kisses me, “I’m not hurt Lilah, the pain of being slammed down by you hurts too good.” He smiles his sly smile and I take him in the air. He’s kissing my neck and grabbing my body, his moans and racing breath makes me moan the same. Sex in midair has every reward possible. “Welcome to the real meaning of “The Mile High club.” I say smiling. He smiles back and we float in each other’s’ embrace.

Gabriel

A swoop of air flies past me and familiar hands are around me. Gabriel. My other lover. He hugs me and his lips finds mine. I feel so guilty for what I am doing. But I don’t know how to remove myself from the situation. I wish that I had never put myself in this situation in the first place, but it’s a little too late to regret. I love two different people. Though my kind would say that there isn’t loving a human. That is doesn’t exists. That they are food and nothing more. That if you think otherwise then you can die like one, or watch them die over and over again. That it’s your choice. I abhor the laws. That’s why I don’t belong to anyone. I am on my own. Been that way since I become a part of this world. “How’s my Lilah?” Gabriel says with his evil demeanor. Sometimes I can’t stand him but then he does something and I love him the next. I can’t stand that to him I am a possession nothing more. “You’re Lilah?” I laugh sarcastically, “I’m no one’s Lilah, You don’t own me Gabriel when are you going to get that through that thick scull of yours.” I say smiling at my honesty. He laughs his comical laugh, “As ever you make me smile.” I rip his hands off of me and walk away.

Why I play hard to get with him, I don’t know. It’s amusing. Sebastian’s’ essence seeps his way into my undead conscience and the vibrations begin again. Gabriel’s hands are around me again. From behind he whispers in my ear, “You will always be mine.” His deep, dark, sinister voice makes me colder than I am natural. With the speed of light I slam him into a wall. His sly smile welcomes me to continue. Kissing him, up and down his body. Leaving my poisonous kiss all over him. He slams me on the floor and I smile, enjoying this pain. The next we’re on the ceiling, then back to the wall. He’s inside me, I moan and bit him. His blood trickles down his back. He moans and bits me. Scratching each other, the ravenous pleasure consumes me. With his hands around my neck, I moan louder and louder. Can’t control the hunger that’s growing inside of me, I let go and come with an excruciating pain of realizing that I am enjoying this and that I am hurting him–my Sebastian.

Lilah

Rushing through the wind, worry elevates me. My world, my little world is caving in on me. Someone has been watching me. Following me. There’s whispers of me and a human being intimate. What I fear most is now becoming my reality. Reaching my destination I hear Gabriel’s thundering voice yell at someone. It almost makes me tremble but it’s not him I’m afraid of. It’s Sebastian. It’s losing Sebastian. It’s what they’ll do to him. “He will see you now.” Says another Vampire, the one he was screaming at. He has a sly smile on his face and anger swallows me. Walking in the room it’s a lot cooler than I wanted it to be, but head held high I continue.

“Well, well, well, how’s my Lilah?” asks Gabriel, more sinister than ever. I smile, “Your Lilah?” I look into his eyes, “I was never your Lilah. I told you this repeatedly.” Nonchalantly I say. I see his broad features tighten. The way he looks at me could burn a hole through this very caste I call my body. “So it’s true. You’re with that human?” he says with disgust.

“I see no point in lying. Yes, it’s true. Hell I wish I’d met him before I got stuck in this dark, depressing ass world you live in.” his eyebrows go in.

“So you’ve chosen then?”

“Gabriel, I’ve chosen the day I became one of you.”

“Are you saying you hate being a Vampire?” his voice playful, “Because that would just be a bold faced lie.”

“It has its pros.”

“So you never loved me?”

The hurt in his voice takes me by surprise. Gabriel wasn’t the sensitive type. He was far from it. “I do love you. I didn’t foresee falling for you but it happened. But don’t make me choose, Gabriel” his eyebrows raise up.

“Don’t make you choose? That’s exactly what’s going to happen. Actually there isn’t a choice. Your human is just as disposable as his life.”

He waves his hand toward one of the grand doorways and my dead heart falls to the floor. Sebastian is thrown to the floor like the trash they say humans are. They’ve beaten him. Drank from him. They tortured him. He looks at me with those all- loving Blue eyes, blood running down his face. I am in utter speechlessness. He could barely speak, “I love you Lilah. I love–” Gabriel kicked him and he flew against the stone walls. His screams turned my eyes blood red. I look to Gabriel who is smiling. Enjoying this torment. He began to speak but anger and rage have completely devoured me. I hear nothing. I fear nothing. I charged at him with speed and strength I didn’t know I had. Before he could react his head was detached from his cold broken body. Growling I attacked the others. Bodies are severed and laid out around the circular room. Blood painted the stone floors. Others ran. I grabbed Sebastian and with that new found speed I was gone with the blink of an eye.

Flying through the arctic air, tears of unbearable pain flooded through me. Being a Vampire only makes emotions including pain ten times greater. I couldn’t hear Sebastian’s heartbeat. Not a pulse. Panic, rage, revenge, pain, cause an internal hurricane. We make it to my secret place. I made sure the Vamp Society knew nothing about. Just in case one day I’d have to hide. I lay his broken and bruised body on the bed. Not knowing what to do, I bite my wrist and put it to his mouth. “You have to drink this Sebastian. Please, you have to. Don’t die on me. I can’t lose you. I can’t. You’re the light that lit up my dark world. Please don’t die on me. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry!” Frantically crying and apologizing, nothing changes. Silence devours the room. I lay with his dead arms around me. Holding his hands remembering the last time who told me he loved me.

Present Day

That night I died with him. I buried him. And on the 7th of every month I go visit his grave. I tell him what I’ve been up to, how much I miss him, that his family misses him too. The Vamp Society didn’t just take away someone that loved me or someone I loved. They took away his family. They took away my life. And as a promise to him I will not stop until they are all dead, until there is only dust because they won’t kill me. This is my punishment. This. Is. My. Living. Hell.